Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Senators Poised to Confirm Dictator for Life with Little Dictator Experience

Washington, D.C.--Now that the Supreme Court is becoming increasingly packed with Justices who think it's their job to rewrite the Constitution by interpreting it in ways that fit their own policy preferences, the U.S. Senate is poised to confirm another dictator for life. But some are concerned this dictator for life has too little dictator experience.

President Obama's Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan "has never been a judge," said one Senator, "and she's only written three law review articles in her long academic career. With that scant record, how are we supposed to know what policies she's going to impose on the rest of us during her unchecked lifetime tenure on the Court?"

Kagan is on record extolling socialism in her college thesis, opposing the presence of military recruiters on school campuses, and opposing the Defense of Marriage Act. "But beyond that," said another Senator, "we just don't know what she thinks. And I'm a little reluctant to vote for another oligarchical master without knowing exactly which freedoms I'm going to lose."

Associated articles: Washington Times; National Review; Daily Caller

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