Friday, December 18, 2009

Guantanamo Bay Class of '09, Now Released, Gathers for Class Reunion, Mass Destruction

Yemen--Detainees released from the detention facility at Guantanamo Bay during the Bush administration were deemed the least likely to return to terrorism, but still one out of seven were caught back on the battlefield.

Today, as even more dangerous detainees are released and recidivism rates are expected to increase, organizers of the “Class of ’09 GITMO Reunion” were pleased with this year’s turnout.

The classmates reunited in Yemen -- a haven for al Qaeda and like-minded mass murderers – and enjoyed Molotov cocktails during an opening reception before rekindling old jihadist ties at dinner.

“It was great to get the gang-bangers back together,” said one suicide bomber. “We all wanted to get stuff off our chests -- including our chests! Boom!”

While there were some disappointments, including the absence of 72 virgins, for the most part the classmates thought the festivities lived up to the terrorist propaganda.

“I thought some of these guys would have lost touch with their hatred after a few years in a humane detention facility featuring the best medical care, art classes, soccer, basketball, table tennis, foosball, and DVD's,” said one former detainee. “But I was glad to see most of my classmates remain the same committed bloodthirsty terrorists I knew and loved.”

Associated articles: DNI report; Fox News; Long War Journal; Bloomberg;;;;; Weekly Standard

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