Monday, August 24, 2009

Religious Leaders Convene Emergency Gathering to Reconcile Contradictory Passages in Obama’s Sermons

Chicago, Illinois.--Religious leaders from around the country gathered to discuss newly-discovered passages in sermons given by President Obama in various town hall meetings to proselytize on behalf of his proposed health care overhaul. The sermons have been found to contain internal contradictions, creating a “crisis of faith” among Obama’s followers which the gathering sought to address.

In Portsmouth, New Hampshire, Obama told followers we can’t “keep the system the way it is right now.” But in Grand Junction, Colorado, he told followers that, under his proposal, “If you like your health care plan, you keep your helth care plan.” But then in Belgrade, Montana, Obama told followers they could only keep their insurance plans if the plans met new, extensive requirements and regulations. Obama also told followers in Colorado that “Medicare is a government program that works really well.” But then he told followers in New Hampshire that Medicare is “unsustainable” and “running out of money.”

The Rev. Jeremiah Wright – Obama’s minister who infamously preached “God damn America” -- convened the meeting of religious leaders and said “Satanic and American armies are at work here, conspiring to cast doubt on the One.”

He insisted that Obama’s apparently contradictory statements were the result not of fundamental internal inconsistencies, but of the demonic “wee wee” forces Obama prophetically alluded to days earlier when he cryptically blamed the unpopularity of his health care proposals on too many people in Washington getting “all wee wee'd up.”

Associated article:; associated videos:;;;

Blog Archive