Saturday, August 29, 2009

Obama Announces Creation of Royal Arts Patronage Program

For the first time in its 40-year history, the federal National Endowment for the Arts convened a conference call to launch a government project encouraging artists to promote the Obama Administration's policies on health care and energy issues.

Throughout the conversation, artists were reminded of their ability to “shape the lives” of others. They did not need to be reminded that the NEA is the country's largest annual funder of the arts.

Following the call, the White House unveiled a series of government-funded paintings designed to "show how awesome their government benefactor is."

Obama formally announced the new program at the unveiling ceremony, stating "We've drawn many of our most hallowed traditions from England, including our common law legal system and, most recently, socialized medicine. Today we institute in America the old English system of royal patronage for the arts in which creative people are funded by the government to promote the grandeur of its blessed monarchs."

Hip up-and-coming artists embraced the opportunity. "Thanks to this government program," said one, "sucking up is cool again."

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