Thursday, July 30, 2009

Obama Invites Voters to White House for Kool-Aid Shots After Saying Electorate Acted "Socialistically" Last November

Washington, D.C.--Saying he "calibrated his words poorly" in saying the electorate acted "socialistically" last November, President Obama invited registered voters to the White House for a dialogue over "multiple Kool-Aid shots" to help “smooth things over.”

The event followed President Obama's invitation of a Cambridge, Massachusetts, policeman to the White House for a beer after he said the officer acted "stupidly" even though Obama admitted he hadn't known all the facts when he made the comment.

Crowds gathered on the South Lawn throughout the day as people enjoyed a mind-altering combination of vodka, Jagermeister, and grape flavored Kool-Aid.

"We were all just waiting around for a while," said one voter. "Then someone asked when the dialogue was going to begin. They told us shots first, dialogue later."

President Obama eventually appeared by smashing through a fake brick wall and bellowing "Oh, yeah!"

By early evening, the lawn was scattered with staggering voters yelling "Yeth we c-c-can! Yeth we c-c-can!" and demanding government-run health care.

Associated article: