Monday, August 9, 2010

Democrats Say Government Waste Can Be Paid for by Broadcasting the Horrific Spectacle on Pay-Per-View

Washington, D.C.--Democrats are hoping to recoup at least some of the billions of dollars wasted on failed government spending projects by "broadcasting the horrific spectacle on pay-per-view."

"People pay to watch wrestling and brutal extreme fighting events," said House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. "Why not the epic destruction of their own hard-earned money?"

Preparations are already being made to simulcast Congressional debate on spending measures along with graphic depictions of their predictable, catastrophic results.

"Who wouldn't want to watch massive federal spending on a bridge to a sports stadium for the study of the effects of cocaine on monkeys and the impact of radioactive rabbit droppings on the sex lives of salmon, the nun moth, and freshmen women at Syracuse University? That's so whacked!"

One Republican Congressman said the pay-per-view proposal was yet another government boondoggle doomed to fail, saying "The government should put things on pay-per-view that people would actually pay to watch, like the execution of vicious murders, with the money being used to fund their interminable death penalty appeals."

Associated articles: CNS News; Civitas Institute; Senate Republicans; Fact Check

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