Washington, D.C.--President Obama assured the American people that the country was "in the very best of hands" now that Congress passed a trillion dollar government-run health care plan.At a historic bill signing ceremony, President Obama, a smoker, was flanked by his tax cheating Treasury Secretary and a former top Kansas personal injury lawyer lobbyist who is now Secretary of Health and Human Services.
"This legislation only begins to raise the taxes necessary to pay for this massive government program," said Obama between puffs, "but I'm confident my Treasury Secretary will vigorously enforce the tax laws he once avoided, and that my Health and Human Services Secretary, joined by her former trial lawyer colleagues, will sue the tar out of anyone who violates any of the thousands of additional regulations this legislation creates."
Administration officials emphasized that the nation's health care would now be administered by a smoker, a tax cheat, and a trial lawyer, asking rhetorically "What could go wrong?"
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