Friday, September 11, 2009

Obama Signs Tens of Thousands of Questionable Pardons Submitted by Community Group ACORN

Washington, D.C.--President Obama signed tens of thousands of questionable pardons submitted by the community activist group known as ACORN, which admitted to submitting 450,000 false voter registration forms during the 2008 federal elections.

ACORN has been under investigation in 15 states. The pardons absolved from wrongdoing all 400,000 of ACORN’s members in more than 850 neighborhood chapters.

White House press secretary Robert Gibbs said “The President trusts ACORN,” and noted Obama trained “future leaders” for the organization during his community organizing days in Illinois.

However, some officials at the Office of the Pardon Attorney raised suspicions about the validity of the many pardon applications that were filed.

“Lots of them were written in red crayon, and signed with names like Bert and Ernie,” said one source. “They dumped thousands of these things on us right before the deadline.”

Several hundred of the pardon applications Obama signed simply said “Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?”

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