Friday, May 15, 2009

Late Night Comedians Break Obama Joke Silence; Mock President’s Opposition to Same-Sex Marriage, then Compete for His Hand in Matrimony

Despite a large variety of policy and personal gaffes, President Obama has remained largely immune from criticism by adoring late night comics who seem incapable of faulting a man they consider the most gifted bureaucrat in the world. Comedians say that while Obama's spending taxpayer money as fast as he can, extending government control over more and more industries, and releasing known terrorists, there's very little to mock.

Except one thing: Obama's opposition to same-sex marriage, which, it turns out, they have a deeply personal reason for attacking.

It all started when the first-ever joke at Obama's expense was recorded on the set of the Daily Show. During an interview with White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel, the show’s host, Jon Stewart, asked “Does Obama oppose same-sex marriage because he thinks it means the same boring sex all the time?”

The audience laughed, and Emanuel took the remark as a humorous but rhetorical question. But Stewart persisted, flashing an unusually serious-not-goofy facial expression that sank the studio into a tense silence. "If Obama married me," said Stewart, "I’d rock his world, every which way and backwards."

“If it came off as personal, it was” said Stewart after the taping. “Obama’s the most intelligent, beautiful, and witty human being in the world, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him.”

The next night, Stephen Colbert, the cerebral jokester behind the Colbert Report, made his own pitch. “Obama's sole imperfection is his rejection of my right to marry him," he said. "That one policy position stands in the way of our achieving the perfect union together, and I have to start using humor to break down that barrier.”

Stewart publicly proposed to the President on his show last night. Industry insiders said he was forced to act quickly when he discovered David Letterman had purchased a ring and Jay Leno had reserved most of the popular summertime wedding sites.

Sources say the comedic assault on Obama’s support for traditional marriage involves all the top television comics. "This is more than a love triangle," said Colbert. “It's a love dodecahedron!"

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